Being there for each other is such a core component of TOPS!
TOPS pals and coworkers are great supporters, but cannot be with me 24/7.
So, another essential element of my journey to my best health is learning to be my own cheerleader.
I also need to support myself in order to be there for others who need me. Sometimes, the harshest critic of me is ME.
Words matter so much — and the words I keep saying to myself have power.
Here are four core areas within each of us, that we can explore as we support our own journeys:
- Unrealistic expectations: Setting the bar so high that you could not possibly reach it; this may make you want to quit before you start. That first bar needs to be one you can almost reach. You can always raise the bar, one step at a time.
- Attempts to please others: No matter how hard you try, you cannot please everyone all the time. I can give my best and treat others with honesty, kindness and respect. My happiness is not dependent on whether others think this is enough.
- Perfectionism: Give yourself and those around you permission to have limitations, make mistakes, to fail and to learn as we go along our paths. I have probably learned a lot more through the years from my missteps than I have from my successes. Overall, things turned out well. Celebrate imperfections. All of us have them.
- Social comparison: It is normal to look around and notice what others are doing. It is not so helpful if we place values on those observations and always find ourselves lacking in some way. All of us do better in some areas and less well in others. Focusing on what “they” have that is “better” can devalue ourselves.
A negative self-opinion can certainly affect the way we function in the workplace, in daily social situations, family relationships and romantic relationships. Also, it can undermine goal setting and decision-making. A positive self-image empowers making important decisions, taking risks, connecting with others and reaching goals. Stay in the present and focus on how far you have come.
- Take inventory of your strengths and build on them
- Accept compliments from others and give some to yourself.
- Learn from your mistakes and forgive yourself.
- Be as kind to yourself as you would be to another person.
- Keep cheering yourself forward! You are with the effort.
Learning as I go, Barb