Today’s blog comes to you from Mary Mullane, a TOPS service program administrator.
Habits. We talk about them frequently, usually about breaking or kicking them. “Habit” has several meanings, and while originally defined as a garment, a habit can also be something we repeatedly do. It shouldn’t come as a surprise then, that our clothes closet is a glimpse, not only of our sense of style, but also a direct reflection of what we choose to practice.
Looking in my closet, I find a variety of sizes, some larger than needed, but they are outnumbered by a smaller set which haven’t been worn in a very long time. As I search for something to wear, I am reminded of the high and low points of my journey. Searching the closet is like a reunion with old classmates. It rekindles the memories of different times and different feelings – some memories more pleasant than others, making me wish I could turn back the clock.
I am quickly reminded of the habits practiced at the time they made their first debut, and resolve to practice them again, refusing to give up.
Perhaps that’s why I’ve chosen to keep them. I anticipate the day I can free them from the closet. The problem is, they have me outnumbered, and as special as those memories are, because of their numbers, I am overwhelmed and often feel defeated by them.
Yes, I want to return to those sizes again, but I also need to feel good about myself: Where I am today, and the habits in my closet have created a mental obstacle.
It’s time to let them go and focus less on what was, and more on what can be. Time to create and practice new habits long enough that they become a permanent lifestyle. Time to clean the closet.
Service Program Administrator