Yesterday, I was reading a news article that a good friend had shared with me. In South America, there is a tribe whose members had been dying prematurely for generations. The cause was a rare disease. Scientists finally discovered it was carried by an insect that lived in the walls of their adobe lodgings. The natives had a choice of several solutions. They could destroy the insects with a pesticide. They could tear down and rebuild their homes. They could move to where that species of insect didn’t live. Or they could do nothing and continue to die young. In the end, they chose the last alternative. For the temporary, often illusory comfort of staying as they are, they paid the terrible price of a life not truly lived.
I put the piece down, shook my head in disbelief and then paused. I reconsidered what I had just read. I reflected on the many people who I have known who have very similar circumstances in a more modern setting. I have dear friends who smoked, being fully aware of the risks and potential impact, but who chose to continue smoking and shortened their lives as a result. I have family who dealt with alcohol unsuccessfully, and their time with all who loved them was shortened by decades. Then, I remembered aunts and uncles who lost limbs (and eventually lives) to diabetes because they were unwilling to choose changes that they knew could help them deal with this life and limb-threatening illness. That lead me to consider the many people I know who have serious health issues associated with obesity. Even in modern civilization, we seem to be no more capable of choosing the more enduring, healthy path than this remote South American tribe.
I wonder if it is human nature to want to choose the path of no change, involving the least resistance and least effort. I am grateful for the support and strength of fellow members in this organization. They remind each other often that while risk comes with a price, the price one pays for being unwilling to risk may, in fact, be greater. Staying within our individual or group comfort zones or maintaining the status quo are not necessarily good things.
It is an unquestionable truth that in order to become who I can be, I must be willing to give up being who I am. So what will it be? Are we going to live our lives fully…or simply live our lives without choosing to change what we know should be changed?
I Care, Barb
By Sylvia J Duncan September 23, 2014
Barb’s thoughts and the above comments were thought provoking. Very.
I believe that unlike some addictions our love of food is an easier one to turn around. Why ? Because although nothing can quite replace highly addictive substances – there are many tasty luscious substitutes for unhealthy foods.
It takes time and discipline to plan , shop for, and cook appetizing meals.We KOPS have to keep promoting that not only is it worth it to change but it can also be a pleasure to eat well.
By Barb Cady September 27, 2014
Excellently reasoned, Sylvia!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
By Barb Cady September 15, 2014
My hope is always that if we keep trying, we may find the link, connection, cure or pathway that works for us. This is definitely a journey not for the faint of heart and definitely not just because willpower may not be strong enough in a given moment. I believe we have to keep trying.
By Debra L. Wilson September 15, 2014
I believe that eating, smoking and drinking way to much for most is a disease that most people can reach a low and get the will or desire or motivation to change their situation but with that being said,- I absolutely believe that for some people they are missing some link in their DNA that gives a person the ability to have some control. We’ve all seen the alcoholic that just cant quit..WHO I ask, would choose to live their lives that way if they could change it, My Mother at the age of 60 was dying of emphysema and I can remember her crying in her arms at the kitchen table so hard the table shook saying she just couldn’t quit…The 600 pound person we see on T.V. that has been put in the hospital on a diet plan and still cheating on their diet. Seems simple enough but for some people something is missing that is not as simple as willpower,
By Don Whiting September 15, 2014
Motivation is something that always interests me. What motivates people to change or not to change? I’m currently listening to Kelly McGonigal’s “Choose to Change” webinars (because Kelly is so far beyond awesome). I’ve come to two conclusions. First, you have to want to change more than you want to stay the same. And secondly, you have to have hope that change is possible.
It has been my experience that those stuck struggling with obesity fall equally into two categories. Those that don’t honestly want to change (and the word honest is important there). And those that desperately want change in their lives but don’t think it is possible.
Within TOPS, I have met many people who fall into the first camp. They come to the meetings and want to lose by osmosis. They come to the meetings and listen to the presenters, and then for the next 167 hours they proceed to live their life the same way they always have. And in a way, I don’t blame them. In the very first session of Kelly’s course she states outright that “change IS suffering”. Change is HARD. Change takes effort. So why change? You have to firmly believe that the suffering that you experience in adopting that change will improve your life and ward off future suffering.
I was speaking to a chapter in Osgoode, Ontario on Saturday and did a slideshow presentation. I think the two most important, and certainly the two most appropriate are:
1) “Dreams + Hard Work = Success” (aka “Hope is a very ineffective weight loss method.”)
2) “I Will Not Tell You That It Is Easy, But I Will Tell You That It Is Worth It” – there is reason this is the tagline to my blog. CHANGE IS HARD. Adopting a healthy lifestyle and maintaining that lifestyle does take time and effort. Which is why I try at every turn to express HOW WORTH IT IT IS!!!
If people know IT IS POSSIBLE and IT IS WORTH IT, they will be more willing to change. If the tribe in this example had seen other tribes suffering from the same parasites do the work and see that this other tribe is now healthy and living long, happy lives maybe they would be more willing to commit to the same change themselves.