Sharing one important lesson she’s learned during the quarantine period is TOPS Second Vice President and Service Program Administrator Deanna Bies.
Deanna Bies Lesson
What If . . .
In listening to someone answer a question on TV regarding the pandemic, I heard the person saying, “‘What if’ is the song of anxiety.” I was doing something else at the time, but my brain tuned in to those seven words and made me think about all the times I had heard them said, either by someone else or by myself (in my head or out of my mouth) in these last few months.
During this time of the unknown, these words play louder than ever. This time of uncertainty has especially made remaining positive a daily mental exercise. If I’m not playing this “what if” scenario in my head, I hear it repeated either on TV, on the phone, in emails or in person. When we really don’t know the outcome, it is difficult to focus on what we do know.
What we know is that “Today, I am OK.” Today, I can get out of bed, get myself dressed and be ready to face whatever is ahead of me. Today, I am able to go about doing what needs done. Today, I can make wise choices. Today, the sun will shine somewhere.
“What if” we could let go of needing to know. In reality, it doesn’t matter about tomorrow, because first we have to get through today. Playing the “what if” scenario only delays our being able to function where we’re at this moment. I don’t like feeling anxious. When I am fretting, I tend to make unwise choices and then I have to deal with a whole new range of emotions that result.
In the future those two words, “what if,” will cause me to pause. Instead of adding a new consequence on the end of the two words, I will ask myself, “Can I let go of needing to know?” If I can answer yes to letting go, my day will be less stressful, I will be less anxious and I will be able to make wiser choices.
Can you let go of the needing to know?
By Kim Freiheit October 14, 2020
I’ve never heard the saying “What if?” is the song of anxiety” before. I won’t forget it from now on. Thank you. 🙂
By G. Jean oertel September 30, 2020
I would add what if, I let go and let God.
By Phyllis B. Solod September 29, 2020
Thank you for this easy lesson. It makes good sense. I enjoy these by weekly tibbits,
Thanks again.
By Ron Wenberg September 29, 2020
Thanks for such inspiring words of wisdom Deanna. that what if game can be so overwhelming not only during these trying times but anytime we’re trying to cope in a “normal” world when there’s so much that can get in our way of losing weight and getting healthier.
By Rosemary Evers September 29, 2020
This is awesome! Worry about tomorrow steals the gifts from the presence! Be present and Mindful today! <3
By Barbara Hollis September 29, 2020
Congratulations Gretchen on your achievements. When we had to stop our TOPS meetings I told myself I must be careful and not gain weight AND lose my kOPS. I “floated” along staying about my usual weight then decided why not use this time to lose and lower my goal. We will resume weigh-ins next month and I have lowered my goal 15 pounds and am a few pounds under. It takes discipline and I am trying hard to do that.
By Janice Doppler September 29, 2020
I agree that there are many “what if’s” That generate anxiety and letting go of the need To know is beneficial. Replacing them with a positive “what if” Could help. What if I go for a walk? What if I eat a piece of fruit? What if I check in to see how a friend is doing?
By Val Webb September 28, 2020
Thank you for the “what if “ today . I really enjoy the messages each week & pass them on to members. We have been able to weigh in the pass 2 weeks & follow all the rules at the centre where we meet.
By Margo Bouchard September 28, 2020
Nice article. It really hit home somewhere inside my head.
Margo
TOPS NM 0216 Albuquerque
By Sylvia Duncan September 28, 2020
Thank you for being realistic support. .This is what we all need most along with strong encouragement to make the wisest of choices.
By Gretchen September 28, 2020
Hearing the words Weight gain is inevitable during COVID given our needing to quarantine made me determined I wasn’t adding to what I was unhappy with myself about. I was already the heaviest I’d ever been! Decided I was going to be like a butterfly instead! I’m down 25 lbs since June 22nd and determined to meet my weight loss goal by years end! I have 9 lbs to go. ♀️ Walking at sunrise and sunset makes social distancing fairly easy. Food has been mind over matter. Ordering smaller size clothes online adds to motivation along with feeling better inside and out! .
By Deanna Bies September 28, 2020
Way to go! Being the butterfly is such a positive picture to help yourself move in the right direction. Keep fluttering!